It’s All About Thyself in 2012

What a great year. If I had to rate 2012, it’d be in the top three years of my existence. Hello. Yes, the world did not end. And we all feel pretty shtoopid for even considering that the Mayans were accurate. Lying bastards. Anyway, I usually start off my yearend review with the one word that will encapsulate the whole year. This year, however, was so special and full of randomness that it’s not right to just use one adjective to describe it. So let me just say that 2012 was awesome and let’s all be at peace with it.

If you follow and keep waiting for fresh stories from moi, there is something seriously wrong with you. I don’t write anymore. Last entry I did was the 2011 review, and it’s already 2013. So let us all pretend that 2012 was that awesome that I did not find time to document every damn thing that made it all very memorable. Yes, I’m going to go with that.

The first half of the year was pretty steady. It was more of a build-up to what will be the best second half of a year ever. One thing worth mentioning is my quitting of smoking. YES, kids. I have been cigarette sober since the last days of 2011. It was a cliché resolution for 2012, but I freaking accomplished it. I said I was going to try to live all healthy and technically I did. Because I stopped abruptly, without even thinking about it, people ask how. Well, I am not ashamed to say that my intention at first was not for my own good, but to possibly impress. But after a few weeks, which turned into months, I was already doing it for myself. And it has been one of the things I’ve been proud of. Now I can run, climb stairs, taste flavors better and hug people.

Cannot really remember anything spectacular from February, but March had a moment. It was one of those moves that I was hoping to be a “game-changer.” First of all, it was never a game, and nothing changed. I invested a lot. Something I never do. But I figured, what the hell, right? Ridiculously cheesy greetings and sweet goods: Nothing. For every good intention, there is always an equally harsh frustration. Upside: I made a friend.

Months passed and it was still pretty steady. A friend went home from the states and slapped me with the cruel truth. TFTFZ mode. YES, kids. I laughed after knowing. A weird reaction, they say. But somehow I already knew but you know the power of wanting something so bad that everything else is irrelevant. What surprised me is I didn’t even know we were friends, or at least she thought of me as one. Whatevs. Granted I kind of lost a friend before we entered the BER months, everything made sense after that.

I am okay. I cannot say that enough. I am okay. September came and it was the best September ever. This one I’m sure of. Mom turned golden and instead of a party, we decided to take a trip. I’m no traveler. I like going places but I don’t enjoy trips. When will teleportation be available, nerds? Hong Kong is the best country ever. Okay, that sounded biased. It’s the only other country I’ve been to, but I had the time of my life there. Again, not going to go into details but I have decided I want to live there. I’d fit in perfectly. I had so much fun there that up to now I find myself daydreaming I was walking down the streets of Nathan and eating different kinds of strange yet heavenly dimsums. I’m no traveler but I think this trip lit up something inside me that this year I plan to visit friends across Asia. I said plan.

The Year of the Dragon

September always takes the cake and last year’s was no different. However, a close relative lost her battle with cancer by the end of the month. You can call my Tita the glue that holds the Ventura clan together. She’s also one of the best people I have ever known. And you know what they say about genuinely good people, they go ahead of everyone. The fam is still experiencing some grief until now but we’re making progress.

After Hong Kong, I don’t think I’ve ever had a boring weekend since. October ain’t different. Three-peat championship for my San Beda Red Lions. This championship may be the second sweetest in the last seven years. Don’t ask me why, it just is. More parties and events here and there all the way to November, where it held a party that was years in the making: the debut of my cousin Camille. It was a night of glamour, awesomeness and loads of Camille.

December ended just a couple of days ago but it had to be the longest, busiest but definitely fun December ever. Never-ending Christmas parties which was kicked off the company yearend party that seriously sucked. Sans for the hot DJ, that was a terrible party. Then there was the wedding of my good buddy Van and his lovely wife Choy. I swear, I have never seen a couple so happy to be married. You two should be role models for our other friends that are already hitched and those that are planning to. It was also in their pre-wedding party a couple of months ago that I started reinventing myself. Well, not so much reinventing but more like reverting back to my “real self. “

Of course, next to Hong Kong, the best part of 2012 was the homecoming of Ninang Cathy and her sons, Nicolo and Angelo, and The Return of Iya. It’s been seven years since their last trip to our islands and 10 years since Ninang and Nicolo’s last spent Christmas with the fam. A Very Bernabe Holiday is what I called the last three weeks of December. Saying goodbye to them was hard. I’m usually good with goodbyes. I always think, bah, I’ll see you later anyways. But this time was different. I have never felt the fam this close in years, possibly decades. It’s amazing how three short weeks defined a lifetime of happiness for the Bernabes. I mean that. Also, I miss Angelo very much.

A Very Bernabe Holiday

I did not get what I want last year. I got something much better: a new lease on life. Another cliché, really? It’s 3:00 am in the morning, what do you expect? I’m hardly coherent anymore. But it’s the truth. The frustrations and sighs will always be there, that I’m sure of. But I will not let it affect me anymore. I call it heart lobotomy. I’ve also taken several risks, especially with how I look. Fam and friends may not agree with my couture choices but, hey, let’s keep an open mind, shall we? For 2013, fucks will only be given to those who/that are worthy. I might sound and come off as a jerk, but what’s wrong with being one? They always get the girl and they’re rich. For 2013, I am looking out for number one and number one alone. Lowered expectations, less frustrations.

So far the joys and awesomeness of 2012 was carried over to the first few weeks of 2013. I feel significantly good and I know everything is okay. We’ll see if it will hold in the coming months as a major life-changing change is definitely coming.

Ten hashtags of 2012: #FAMILY, #FASHION, #HEALTHY, #INVESTMENT, #ITSOVER, #LOBOTOMY, #LOSINGONESFAITH, #MAJORBREAKUPS, #PARTYGOD, #TRAVEL. (--,)